I really want to be able to dance like Jake Shears.. I can't dance... I'm not a dancer.
Sometimes, I want to have Jake Shears babies.
We could enter them in Eurovision and they would win.
I never wish I was a gay man more, than when I'm listening to the Scissor Sisters.
I love them in an inappropriate way.
Then I listen to the Foo fighters, and I'm glad to be a girl again...and I want to have a huge trashy Vegas wedding and marry Dave Grohl.
I was trawling you tube recently, and I found this... I have never felt so sexually conflicted.
(WARNING, CONTAINS BADLY BLURRED TESTICLE IMAGERY)
"I just don't want Jakes balls, in mah face" clap.