Friday, February 15, 2013

Too Much drama, and those are the days of our lives....


So this week can go get. Other than My eldest boy Luke celebrating his 14th Birthday, (I'd include a pic, but he is a little blog shy) This week has been a nightmare.
I have had so much drama that I have been practicing my slow determined stare in between dramas.

Like this..




So first off, we had a pipe burst I between the laundry and bathroom wall. A hot water pipe, and hot water was pouring out from underneath the skirting boards of the laundry.

I hope it is covered by our insurance, we will find out when the insurance assessor comes on Monday.



Later that day, Andie engaged the checkout lady at Coles in conversation, and explained that we were waiting for the Ed Sheeran's man to come and look at mum's broken pipe.

She meant Insurance man, but I did nothing to dispel the rumour and I took a mental note to stop talking about Ed Sheeran... But before I do, I will have you know, that I have floor tickets to Ed's Wollongong gig on the 28th.... Gasp, pant, and gasp. *Dies.
 I have to go Nigel's, but I Don't even care. I have never been to a concert by myself before, but I assume it is the same as going with someone; I will just care less about how much of a dick I look like when I am dancing. I'll be all like... "I don't know you!" boogie.





Meanwhile, one of our cats went missing, for a WHOLE night.



 I silently seethed at everybody on my street, (except for you Mandy, I know it wasn't you, I was with you when the cat went missing, your alibi is solid) but I seethed whilst peeking out from between the blinds trying to pick the guilty culprit.
 Turned out he was under the house the whole time, so it wasn't anybody, Sorry about that. Carry on.

I also had to visit the School twice this week, and not for award type things. For meetings. I HATE school meetings.. I don't. Want. To talk about it.

Next, just when I thought things might start to settle down, there was a knock at the door..
I opened it to see a woman standing on my porch, obviously intoxicated, because she smelt like an infected ass fell into a wine vat, crawled out and died.

She was swaying on my front porch, and introduced herself, (I won't repeat her name here), but she then insisted I leave, because this was her house, and I had no right to be in it, also she had to come in, now and what the fuck did I do wiv all er' maams plants?
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I told her that I could call her an ambulance, or the police, or a taxi but she would have to leave. Now.

She began kicking things on my porch, well, kicking them as well as a very intoxicated person can, which wasn't very well as she had a hard time keeping upright when standing on one leg, so call the police it was, and she left.

One of the neighbours from across the road came over and informed me that the same woman had let herself into her house the other day; she came in from the clothesline to find her sitting on her lounge. WTF!? *locks the door.

Damn I gotta move.

I spent the next six hours reassuring the children she would not return, and Andie that this was in fact, our house. Short of showing her the deeds, which would be redundant as she can't read yet, and has no concept of what deeds are, also impossible as the bank has them, I did the best I could.

And now, I have had it.
I'm tired, and worried about having to give out wristies from the back of the BI-LO car Park to pay for the water damage to my house, of which the children are now unsure whether or not is actually ours, and I have a headache, and Im a little bit hungry. I am also bracing myself for an en mass teenage boy gathering at my house on Saturday night.. Which is a whole other post, but send reinforcements, wine and chocolate, also something savory... like toobs, PLEASE!!!

So I bid this week a good riddance, and you, a Happy Friday, with hopes for a much more boring next week.


You said it dude.. L for love.
Happy Friday.

Emma xx

3 comments:

The Kids Are All Right said...

Out of all those dramas, it is the impending party for your teenager that scares me the most. There is no Bold & The Beautiful face for that. Good luck.

Tara @ Our Whirlwind Adventures said...

I'd be all like 'Hell no sister from another mister get yo trashy ass off my porch, this be my crib and un-uh yo ain't goin' no where near my couch. Ya herr? Fo' shizzle!'
Then finger snap at her X 3.
Then lock your fucking door.

You could always invite her back to baby sit the teenage boy shindig, while you sit outside getting sloshed and singing Karaoke into a garden hose (I have totally NEVER done this...)
But probably not a good idea.
Your couch might get vomit on it.
Or the clap.
From her.

Nothing to see here folks.
Nothing to see here.

P.S. I heart Ridge.

I mean.. Who the hell is Ridge!?

Tara @ Our Whirlwind Adventures said...

I'd be all like 'Hell no sister from another mister get yo trashy ass off my porch, this be my crib and un-uh yo ain't goin' no where near my couch. Ya herr? Fo' shizzle!'
Then finger snap at her X 3.
Then lock your fucking door.

You could always invite her back to baby sit the teenage boy shindig, while you sit outside getting sloshed and singing Karaoke into a garden hose (I have totally NEVER done this...)
But probably not a good idea.
Your couch might get vomit on it.
Or the clap.
From her.

Nothing to see here folks.
Nothing to see here.

P.S. I heart Ridge.

I mean.. Who the hell is Ridge!?